shhh.

Shhh quiet you might piss somebody off.
Tomorrow is my biology exam. After that I am going to have an amazing nap.
:) And maybe sometime during the week see Frannie to swap our musicz! Joy!


Then there is only one thing standing between me and the rest of my life...
Accounting! You horrid horrid horrid subject.
Now if only I could calm down :)

In hindsight

The word crave looks like cave if only given a quick glance, and cave reminds me of vagina... so I just lol'd ;)

Crave.

I crave your approval.

I don't want to disappoint you, but at the same time I don't want to change the fundamentals of who I am. I don't want to let it all slip away... la la la. :)

THAAAAAAAAANKS

You make me so mad.

prettyprettypretty.

shinyshinyshiny.

I want like a kabillion shiny rings so my fingers are all sparkly :3.

Twirl for me.

Today I got told I looked beautiful and sounded happy.

That was the biggest compliment I will probably ever receive.

I just wish I felt the same way.

Poppycock.

Hahahahahahhaahha.

Maria has decided I need to go on a diet if I want to fit into my grad dress...

It's not my fault I'm growing :(

So, my days of chowing down on health foods have begun.

 I know for certain I will be sneaking to the pantry whilst she is at work. 

I've never been told I need to loose weight before, actually It's usually quite the opposite, none the less.. I will try appease her for now, or at least until after graduation when I go back to being awesome...

"you just need to loose abit around your stomach" is what she thinks, so fml.

/bangs head on table.

Just tonight.

fuck you all.

I am sick of people judging situations.
I am sick of you.
I am sorry that I upset you.
I don't even know what I should do right now.
People should just go away.
I made a fucking mistake, get the fuck over it.

Karma is such a fucking bitch.

:)

Cool.

I hate always thinking of other people, instead of actually saying what I'm feeling.

All I can even manage to say is "whatever".

Maybe one day people will work out that I'm unhappy, or maybe not.

I don't care right now.

But I would probably like to shove a few people through walls.

:)

From the time we’re born until we die, we’re kept busy with artificial stuff that isn’t important.
-Tom Ford

Sid Vicious

The world breaks us all. Afterward, some are stronger at the broken places.

We’re just two lost souls swimming in a fish bowl, year after year.

This is not a love song.

To the lords of all things mystical, public image limited will always be one of the best punk rock bands ever.
Then again, any musical en devour John Lyndon aka. Johnny Rotten takes on is bound to be amazing.
Example numero uno: The sex pistols. A band that will be forever hailed as one of the founding fathers of the punk genre, and a band that have a very warm place in my heart. ilyilyily.
 But alas, after all the Sid and Nancy dramaaaaaaaaaz, it was time for rotten to continue his path of greatness.

Cheap Trick

Because I bounced around in my pj's screaming the lyrics to this song.

Possibly the best song ever.

Rough Hands.

This is cute.

A collection of thoughts.

Today I pulled out a shirt from my cupboard that says

"I can eat whatever I want"

I laughed at the irony of that for around 2 minutes before putting it on...

Sure, I can eat whatever I want as long as it doesn't contain gluten or lactose products :)

And as I was searching, I came across my zombie survival guide which instantly made me think of Gar.

omnomnom.

cool face Gar.

small smiles.

I had the worst day ever, and you wanted to make sure I was okay.

Thankyou for being there for me.

Thankyou for driving to my house to just talk and watch movies...I needed it.

You're an amazing friend and have managed to keep me sane quite a bit recently.

I don't really admit things like this out loud, but a part of me hopes you stumble upon this just so you know how much of a difference you make.

I hope I can do the same for you one day. 

Logic

Turning a simple disagreement into a massive deal, I view that as pure stupidity.

Especially with lines such as "cast me aside again"

Tell me, when did I cast you aside to begin with?

You're the only person I trust enough to talk to, the only person who knows the truth.

The only person I thought would always be happy to talk to me, and happy to listen to what I had to say, as I had done for you on several occasions. And how are you not one of my priorities, It was less than a week ago we had a two hour phone conversation based solely around your problems! I'm sorry if i'm selfish enough to have my own things to deal with, but I definately still cared enough to at least try and help.

But obviously, I missed the memo, and apparently "cast you aside"

I'm not sure how I did this seeing as we hang out quite frequently, and go to the same school... Oh and have the same group of friends.

I didn't realise that you viewed the situation this way, of course you never told me this.. and probably assumed I could read minds. 

Oh and sorry for making mistakes, not like that isn't apart of growing up. I'm sorry I don't choose to listen to everything you say to me, you need to remember it's my life and no matter how strongly you disagree with my decision you can't dictate my actions, life is after all about learning from mistakes and moving forward.

Thanks.

You hurt me.

I have nothing left to say.

Realisation

When all of a sudden, everything hits you...
Not so fun.

Vulnerable

I have this feeling, it makes me weak at the knees.

I feel like I am completely vulnerable.

It sucks, but at the same time I feel so alive.

I am an idiot.

I accidently deleted 8 of my blog posts..
fml.

I thought you were supposed to hold me when I cried.. not walk off and leave me alone.
I hate all the empty promises you give me.
You say you love me, and then just laugh when I'm a mess.
You spend all this money trying to "help" me but you wont even talk to me when I need you more than anyone.

 I want to be able to say I hate you, but I know it's selfish to say things like that.
I wish you realised words hurt more than anything.
I don't just want to be your mistake. And I will never forget the day you told me I was one.

My best friend.

Is beautiful., funny, smart, talented, loving, nice & AMAZING.

and it hurts me when she puts herself down, and truly doesn't believe anything I say about how amazing she is.

I just want her to know how beautiful she is, and that soo many people agree with me.

7 Things.

You're vain, your games, you're insecure
You love me, you like her
You make me laugh, you make me cry
I don't know which side to buy

crystal castles

You don't throw stones if you live in glass houses.

This site is a bit of a distraction.

You're ruining me.

The one person who holds my existance together is crying.

I don't know what to do. 

She keeps telling me "we're going to be just fine"

but we both know thats a lie.

Admitting that would signal our world is truly crashing down, and neither of us want to admit that just yet.

I guess the end is coming but no one knows when it's going to hit.

I just want to break down.

 I am breaking down.

Sorry in advance.

An open letter to society.

People are extremely selfish.

I hate when people say they would disown you if you did something they don't approve of. (and no it wasn't a joke) It's my life and real friends would never turn their backs on you. But maybe my idea of the word "friendship" is extremely unrealistic and outdated.

I don't think it's fair that I play the role of giving advice and offering kind words when others wont do the same for me, infact it pisses me off a fair bit. 

This is exactly why I will no longer confide in  some people

. Especially considering the fact I at least made an attempt to make you feel better.

I'm not saying I don't trust people, I just realised people don't understand me at all. And I guess that's not that bad, I mean I'm happy with how I am. But sometimes I wonder if I truly fit in with you, and that really upsets me. Like really really really upsets me.

emo whinge over.

A year without rain

One day without you is like a year without rain.

Thankyou dearest chlo chlo who linked me this girl ages ago, she does some pretty amazing covers c:

And her voice is about a million times better than Selena Gomez's in the original :3

omg.

This is the worst feeling ever.
I want someone to tell me what to do, but no one can.
I feel so lost, so scared and so small.
Whatever I do, I'm going to get hurt.
I'm going to cry. I'm going to feel like shit.
I don't want this, why cant things be simple, beautiful and carefree?
I hate this.

confusion.

I hate how this is.
I hate that you look at me with knowing eyes.
I hate you know exactly what I'm thinking. ALL THE TIME.
The saying beautiful disaster is sooo relevant to you.
You're a mess, but you're amazing. - you just act like you're okay.
I'm jealous.

Not that I could, or that I would..let it bud under my skin.

I miss you.

There are few songs that make me cry, and although I'm not the avid My Chemical Romance fan that I once was; the song Cancer is possibly the most touching and saddening song of all time.
Having seen someone very close to me go through this horrorfying ordeal and loose the fight has just made the lyrics so much more real.
I miss you.

Cherry Darling

Where the heck is my leg?

Shes kickass, gorgeous and has a machine gun for a leg, quite possibly the best thing ever.


"Names Cherry Darling"
"sound like a stripper name"
"No, it sounds like a go-go dancer name. There's a difference"

Deathproof.

Pam: [talking about Mike's car] Are you sure it's safe?

Stuntman Mike: It's better than safe. It's death proof.

"Hey, Pam, remember when I said this car was death proof? Well, that wasn't a lie. This car is 100% death proof. Only to get the benefit of it, honey, you REALLY need to be sitting in my seat."

Well Stuntman Mike, even you aren't deathproof, you just happen to be a psychotic murderous maniac who gets off killing young women with his car...
Paybacks a bitch.

A year ago...

for c.low ;)

There's something you don't know i've walked you off to keep you on your toes.
There's something you didn't know, i've grown some bones, so i can walk you off.


Tonight, tonight, everythings alright, tonight.


If i were in your shoes i'd run a thousand miles just to tell you.
If i were in your room, using just my eyes i would tell you.


There's something you didn't know you've got your teeth in me and it hurts.
And i'm a lie away from saying what i really think, this is the bottom of the bottle saying swim or sink and you don't even need me now.


Tonight, tonight, everythings alright, tonight.


If i were in your shoes i'd run a thousand miles just to tell you.
If i were in your room, using just my eyes i would tell you



I'm sorry.

chit chat.

Coco before Chanel will always be an amazing movie.

The doctor says.

The doctor says that I'm dehydrated, run down and stressed.
Hah. I can't even keep food down at the moment;
I hate being sick.

But this boy is incredible. ;)

My pumpkin friend.

Today was both the best and worst day ever.
It was amazing when my dad walked through the door with a massive pumpkin, I was so thrilled, I ALWAYS WANTED A PUMPKIN!!!
I don't even know why, but they're so weird and awesome at the same time...
Anyway, I was extremely enthused by the pumpkins arrival and decided it was going to be my new pet. Mr. Pumpkin<3
So as I was dancing around singing some tune about my new pumpkin friend, my dad had reached into the drawer and pulled out the vegetable knife, and to my sheer horror HE SLICED OFF MR PUMPKINS HEAD.
So it turns out we're having pumpkin soup tonight...

R.I.P. Mr. Pumpkin. :(

Someone I love

Ever fallen in love with someone you shouldn't of fallen in love with?
It's probably not love, but there is definately someone in your life that makes life alot harder at times and yet you still let them back in. That sucks.

For we're nocturnal bitch3z ;)

Just a little song that is oh-so amazing!
This one is going on the soundtrack to my life3
(I strongly suggest you give it a listen)

Bring night bring the night on!


In addition to this fantablistical song, I would just like to make note of another of my favourite current musicians. The powerhouse that is Taylor Momsen. Momsen's band The Pretty Reckless are much more than a teenage side-project. Many people were highly sceptical of Momsen's musical abilities prior to hearing her unique voice. This bias was based purely on the idea that she was just another teen soap star who thought she could sing. Momsen proved everyone wrong when her voice was heard, and aside from her ghastly eye makeup and often overly risque clothing options Momsen has the qualities required to become ledgendary.
So, love her or hate her, you cannot deny she is talented.

OH FCUK

A startling crash sounded through the household closely followed by "Ohhhhh fuck". Startled I made my way to the scene of the incident, blood splattered the pale contrast of the walls causing me to heave in a deep breath. He emerged from the hallway with a crimson coloured hand dripping onto the hardwood floors... "wait.. is that pasta sauce?" It appeared as though the magnificent one (also known as sean) had tripped causing his leggos pasta meal to go flying at the wall, as you can imagine many lulz were induced. Instead of initially helping him clean up I decided to search for my camera so I could take evidence of this phenomenal event.
*slow claps*

Day dream...

Wow so many random posts today... but ughhh so much buzzing around in my head right now, I even wrote this song which I admit is extremely odd, but hey what else could be expected from me? So along with my post about random things I love, I missed out two key factors of my love section, although no one can beat gar's obsession with zombies (he will always be my favourite) but some people do come close... such as the lyrical mastermind and overall hearthrob that is of course John O'Callaghan or better refferred to as "John ohh" for lack of a better description he is certainly easy on the eyes... but it appears he also has an added insight that many musicians are missing, I found this out as I was randomly stalking... I mean observing images of him.

So It appears as though he is quite the wise one, brains and good looks, in the infamous words of borat niiiiiiiiice.


On another note, as I was glancing around my room this afternoon my eyes landed on the face of no other than Merrick arguably one of the most dashing men this side of the universe... I mean the fact he makes eating a banana look this good is just proof he was sent from the heavens in order to steal the hearts of girls across the world...

OMNOMNOMNOMNOM

I love unicorns!

So I love unicorns, I always make reference to them and although it is rather random they take me back to the days of running around the backyard pretending I were on an adventure, using the garden rake as my unicorn friend.. yes I was one cool kid.
I love unicorn, BUT I also love random things such as...


This cupcake:

(isn't this just so cute!!)

This postsecret. Oh yes.


...And this one

AHAHAHAHAHAHA.

Betty Page.


This work of art ;)


This boy:

oh yes I'll go to zombie prom with you.


you're pretty.

calm.

Sometimes I can't breathe.
I wish I could be calm, and this panic would just leave me.
I wish I could submerge myself underwater
and when I came up for air all my worries would be gone.

Golly.

I get nervous when you're near me.
You make my heartbeat a million times faster.

I like it.

Smile for me.

So lately alot of people have been posting things on their facebooks and tublr's about how they hate people copying them.
And although I agree strongly that it's annoying to have somone copy your every little move, some of the things people are implying they're being copied over are INSANE!

example numero uno:
person 1: I like bunny rabbits
person 2: omg you slut I liked them first wtf is your problem?!?!?!?

example numero duo:
omg so many people have the same piercing as me, they are clearly copying me because I am like so totally hot.

reality check - NO YOU ARE NOT FUCKING HOT, you're simply a dirty whore.
GET THE FUCK OVER YOURSELF.
Oh wow, you got a piercing? Oh wow you started using a catch phrase? BECAUSE YOU WERE TOTALLY THE FIRST PERSON TO DO THAT. Because you are so important and worth copying.
HOW ABOUT NO.
You're not a person people copy, infact why do you do those things? Oh thats right because you want to be like some celebrity or because you saw it in some "alternative" magazine. You're a sell out, a cheap copy, a fake.
So don't get mad when someone else thinks the same way, you're exactly the same.


agfshwkc; end of angry rant.

This weekend.

I'm going to go to bed at a reasonable time and sleep in, because I can.
I'm going to look at myself in the mirror and not hate what I see.
I'm going to to tell myself I'm beautiful outloud and at least attempt to believe it.
I'm going to embrace the fact that I'm far from perfect.
I'm not going to let your words make me cry anymore.
I'm going to stop caring that my boobs aren't huge and that somepeople think I'm sick.
I'm going to do what I want to do, not what you want me to.

Yep suck it up, I'm over it.

Riddle me this.

One thing I don't appreciate is liars.
Another thing I don't appreciate is selfish gits who take joy in watching others fall
oh-ha-ha
You've had your fun. Thanks for the fucking ride assholes.

Finally, revenge is a dish best served cold, watch your back bitch.

Note to self:

When it is discovered that ones Mother is SATAN one should not provoke said parental unit. For Mother dearest will release her fury and rage onto you.

So cry me a fucking river bitch.

You are the most selfish attention seeking person I have ever met.
You know how he feels about you, and you clearly don't feel the same way for him so what gives you the right to fuck him around?
You're just cold hearted and cruel, and I hope karma gets you back for what you're knowingly doing.
And also, being fake doesn't get you anywhere. I see right through your little facade.


Also Parkway Drive ftw.

Heroine.

Knowing you're going soon is too much to think about.
I want to pretend it's never going to happen. Not to you.
I love you too much to even consider it.
Don't leave me. please.

Freedom.

I'm going to be free.
Free from your bullshit.

Just you wait.

Honesty.

Are you ready to spill your guts?
yes.

What if you married the last person you kissed?
I'd be happy.

What are you listening to?
Down from the sky - Trivium

Have you ever kissed someone who’s name begins with a A or D?
yep-p-p

Has anyone told you they don’t want to ever lose you?
yes <3>
What’s wrong with you right now?
General teenage crappyness.

Do you truly hate anyone?
Hate is such a strong word. More like a general dislike.. :p

Has someone ever made you a promise & broke it?
many many times.

Will you talk to the person you like tonight?
already have :)

What color shirt are you wearing?
grey

Are you friends with the last person you kissed?
yep-p

Have you ever woke up next to someone and wanted to puke?
No... unless waking up on a camping trip to my brothers stinky feet counts.. because that did make me want to puke.

What do you do when you need to relax?
Listen to music and meditate.

Do you have a best friend?
More than one, but there is one girl who is like a sister.

Do you open up to people easily?
Not really.

What do people call you?
liss, lissypoo, Mcdill, gomez, chooklegs.

Has anyone upset you in the last week?
unfortunately.

Is your room clean?
HELL NO.

Favorite color?
Red.

Who is the last person you had a serious conversation with?
My brother.

What color are your eyes?
dark dark dark brown almost black.

When will your next kiss be?
tomorrow?

Do you have a friend of the opposite sex you can talk to?
many.

Can you recall the last time you sincerely liked someone a lot?
right now :)

Do you blow dry your hair?
NARP!

Will you be in a relationship in the next month?
yeeeeeah boy.

Do you have anything that belongs to a partner or ex?
Hmmmmmmmmmm I actually don't know.

How often do you straighten your hair?
pretty much every day...

Was last night terrible?
sleepwise yes.

What should you be doing?
something productive...

Describe how you feel right now in one word?
sore.

Are you scared of anything?
the future.

Do you think more about the past, present, or future?
I worry about things I've done...so the past?

Are promises important to you?
yes

Is there someone who makes you instantly smile when you receive a message from them?
yes :)

What’s the last thing you drank?
coke. mmm healthy

Is your natural hair curly or straight?
curly but I use straightning shampoo so it looks like retarded waves at the mo'

Is tomorrow gonna be a good day?
nope. probably not.

Were you mad when you woke up this morning?
yep.

What were you doing at midnight last night?
chatting'

Has anyone gotten on your nerves lately?
Oh yes.

Will you talk to someone on the phone tonight?
probably.

Is anything wrong with your eyes?
Maybe?

How many pillows do you sleep with?
one...

Who’s the biggest slut you know?
What kind of question is that..?

Do you miss anyone?
Alot of the time.

Are you nice to everyone?
I hope so...but I'm like nervous when I speak to some people...they intimidate me so I seem really shy and reserved.

Think back to the person you fell the hardest for, how do you feel about them now?
I don't know who I fell the hardest for, I know who I liked for the longest period of time... but I think the fact that it lasted so long confuses how much I actually liked said person. I definately like my boyfriend more than any other boy I've liked...and I feel quite happy with that :p

Kissed somebody whose name starts with a J C R T or S?
yesssssssss

Do you ever think about the past?
Yesssssss. All le time.

Do you believe ex’s can be friends?
I like to hope so, I mean why cant we all get along? But then again people break up for a reason so I get why they may not be able to have the whole friends thing...

Do you currently have a hickey, if so where?
narp

Name something you did yesterday?
homework. shit I'm cool.

As of this minute, what is going through your mind?
Whether or not I should eat the marshmellows.

Does anyone know your password besides you?
I think my dad does...

Are all of your friends virgins?
Some of them are

What did you do last night?
slept?

Have you ever kissed somebody driving?
that sounds silly?

Is the last person you texted single?
yes

What are you most looking forward to today?
sleeping

Do you THINK you like anyone?
Yes.

Have you ever been awake for 48 hours?
ahaahah oh yes.

Europe or the Caribbean?
Europe baby.

Look outside, how’s the weather?
wet. It appears as if the weather God's are sexually excited.

Are you jealous of anyone right now?
Jealousy's the cousin, the cousin of greed. But yes, I am insanely jealous.

Did you ever think someone didn’t like you, but came to find out they really liked you?
yeh worst timing ever though.

Do you regret something today?
not right now...

If you had to choose someone to sleep next to every night who would it be?
;) I wonder...

Is there a difference between love and being in love?
Definately! I love my friends so much but I'm not in love with them.

How long until your next birthday?
Agessssssss

What time did you go to sleep last night?
no freaking clue.

Do you hate being alone?
Well, in the physical sense of being alone, no. I like to have my space to just unwind and let out my anger.

Day been rough?
nope.

Who knows a secret about you that no one else knows?
alex.

Have you ever had your heart broken?
yes...

Do you look decent when you wake up?
I look tired...and pissed off

Does anyone have something that belongs to you?
probably

Do you have anything that belongs to someone else?
yes.. chris's books

Do you get jealous easily?
These questions are so similar... and I don't get jealous easily, but I still get jealous..

Are you happy?
moderately

Do you know anyone who lives in New York?
ummm nup

Do you wish someone would turn up at your front door right now?
yeah.

Have you kissed someone in ‘10 that you care about?
yes.

Have you ever slow danced with someone?
Oh God. Yes.

Have you ever kissed a blue-eyed person?
yeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah ;)

Do you ignore people when you’re mad/upset with them?
I attempt to ignore people.. and fail.

What’s worse, having someone mad at or disappointed in you?
disappointed...it makes you feel like a failure.

Is this the best year of your life?
some parts are, but alot of parts are horrid.

Who do you tell everything to?
jake.alex.chris.

Who’s vehicle were you in last, outside of family’s?
ummmmm fuck i dunno

What are you going to do after this?
shower power

Do you make eye contact when you talk to people?
sometimes...

Do you wear make up?
yessm.

Valarie

This is beautiful.
How I wish Amy would go back to making music...

Question mark

Three words can make so much difference.

I love you.

I want to be loved.
I want you to see the real me and love me for it.
I want you to talk to me as if I mattered.
I wish I could make you love me, but I know I cant and it kills me.
But most of all I want to make you proud.
I want you to look at me and know that I'm going to be someone for others.
Know that I will always be there for you when you need me.
Know that I love you as much as I want to be loved by you.

If it means alot to you

You know you can't give me what I need

And even though you mean so much to me

I can't wait through everything

Is this really happening?

I swear I'll never be happy again

And don't you dare say we can just be friends

I'm not some boy that you can sway

We knew it'd happen eventually.

Tell me something sweet to get me by

You don't realise how much you help.
Sometimes I feel like I let you down, knowing how much you truly care about me.
It must annoy you to see me fall into the same cycle over and over.
I know it hurts me.
It hurts me to know how much you care, and yet I still feel so alone.
But despite this, you persevere until I'm laughing like a loon.
Although my self esteem is low, you write me little comments and emails to make me smile, and call me as soon as you think I'm upset.
You'll never know how many times you've stopped me from doing stupid things. And I hope I can do the same for you.
I could say thank you a million times over, but it still wouldn't express how thankful I am to have you in my life.
You're not just a good friend, you're an amazing person.
I pray to God that I don't loose you, because I don't even know what I'd do without you.
you're the nate to my chuck. (yes the gossip girl references continue)

I will always think of you as one of my closest friends. Someone worth trusting.

Oh It Is Love

(http://s976.photobucket.com/home/x3timeformetofly)

This is adorable, It's exactly how I saw relationships when I was a little girl.
Boy meets girl, girl laughs at boy's jokes and they fall in love.
I was young and naive. Too stupid to know the truth about the world.
In this day and age saying that four letter word means so much but so little at the same time.
Some people just throw it around recklessly - not realising how much it might mean to the person their saying it to.
I wont be that naive little girl who blurts it out to the boy I like, when I say it I will mean it with all my heart. I wont doubt what I'm saying. It wont be too soon.
Saying that four lettered word is a sign of weakness, a sign that you're not as tough as want people to believe - it takes guts to do that, but it takes more to wait.

Ouch

Have you heard the word hypocrisy?
It suites you oh so well.
"That girl's a slut"
So tell me why you act exactly like her?
"I don't like it when people talk behind my back"
You're supposed to be my best friend, not someone who talks about how I'm going to change for a boy.
I've stuck by you through thick and thin, but I'm constantly made your second priority when he's around.
I ditched him to make sure you were okay. Would you do the same for me?
Out of everyone you should know how fragile the world is, and yet you continue to run around without a care, hurting people as you go.
Let me know when you want to go back to the start.
Three strikes. You're out.

Why...

Why must I dress in a way that shows too much of my skin?
Why will I continue to be judged on my appearance over my personality?
Why do people lie to hurt others?
Why am I looked down upon for not giving up my virginity?
Why do boys/girls think it's acceptable to use others for personal gain?
Why must I drink, do drugs, put out to be in the "cool" group?
When will he realise how much it hurts...
When will she see how much shes become one of them. One of the people we vowed to never become.
When will I become disposable?... thrown away like a used child's toy.

When will they see life is more than high school drama, boys, girls, sex, alcohol, drugs, rebelling against the rules instead of rebelling for a cause.
And so I put on my mask, everything is fine...